New Year, new things to discuss

Whoo! That was wierd. Okay, here goes, guys who read my blog but I don't know if you exist or not.

This spring semester, meaning RIGHT NOW, I am in ROTC. What does that mean? Means my fat ass gets the workout it deserves and the emotional teenager in my brain gets beaten up a lot. All in all? Great deal.

No, I do not plan to join the military(soon), I do hope that doing this will help my grades and maybe help me to get a job at some point. I figure passing an ROTC course is LIKE saying I was in the military...right?

Anyway! money! Need a job, quick...like...NOW would be good. My schedule this semester is really flexible, hell I only have one class today and I just got out of it! Yay!

...So, with that said, let's move onto the good news: You get to see my face!
Yep! I totally plan to vlog, every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and sometimes Thursday but that's neither here nor there.

What will I vlog about? whatever happened that day mostly, or maybe about what might happen later :P

Hope you guys will keep reading, if tehre's anyone reading to begin with.

Working in the summer

Working is good for you. Builds character, brings in the money, gives you something to do, keeps you fit(mentally and/or physically).

Been here a week, gonna be here for two more. All two of you that read my blog? Thanks. Tell your friends. I'm not boring, I just have no one to talk to. This isn't a screaming cry of emoness. This is boredness and wanting to talk with people from over the rainbow.

See ya guys around.

To the tune of "Stan" by Eminem

I never realized how crazy I was till I bought a CD and it was
Curtain Call, by Eminem and I thought "it's just entertainment, it don't mean nothing"
but then I had a listen, and one song in and I was trippin
Wondering just what happened to my brain as my eyes started waterin'
and I was thinking "damn these are the feelings I been missin"
It all brought up the painful shit, every word, every verse
Thinking bout the universe and what it's done to me
and how it's affected me and done shit to me.
I didn't think i was this fucked up but i was wrong
and all of it came up from just one song and all I can do is cry myself to sleep tonight...

Chorus: Elton John
My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be gray,
put your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..

Whenever I thought up my life right now
I never thought I'd be so down
and out of sorts with myself
This was unexpected
Who'd ever thought I'd feel so unprotected
from everything the world has to offer
I was almost a father but my baby died and
all I do now is cry into my pillow at night
wanting to scream out in fright
as i feel myself crushed beneath the weight of world on my shoulders.
Who'd ever thought I'd feel like this
I only have one wish and that's to not feel so bad
about the life I've had...

Chorus: Elton John
My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be gray,
put your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..

And then in two years I gotta go to school,
Before that I need to learn to work around the rules
so I can do better
But what I need now more than ever
is the people who love me so I can cry to them and maybe feel better
about myself, instead of leaving painful letters
about shit to strangers on the internet
I didn't think I'd be this pathetic
to cry about my feelings and shit to people I don't know
I don't even have any readers on this blog who care enough
to leave a comment, you fucking cunts
Fuck you and all your shit!
I have better shit to do than talk to no one about my problems.
If you had it your way you'd shot me yourself
so no one has to deal with my mental health
No more from you, you don't say nothing anyway
So i'm gonna go and maybe swing by Safe Way

Chorus: Dido
My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be gray,
put your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..

After reading shit I've said and writing out this rap
i realize that all my life is full of crap
but that don't mean that it gotta stay that way
all i have to do is try not to stray
off the path the gods have given me
and continue going towards the light and infinity
and beyond that is a good life for me and mine
I'll try to never fall off and lose my spine
cause that would mean I was broken,
but I'm not broken down, i'm just started smokin'
and from the ashes of that smoke will rise a phoenix
So I'll just go on so you can finally, with me, see it. Yea...

Chorus: Elton John
My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be gray,
put your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..

When you've just had enough

Abuse

Don't hit your kids. Just don't fucking try it. This news post was going to be for plugging a few of my favorite webcomics. Now, after hearing the screams outside my window and seeing a father beat his daughter into the ground before shoving her into the car to take her to school, I know what today's topic is going to be about.

I was hit as a kid as a disciplinary measure. I'll tell you this, it never taught me crap. Just that violence makes people do what you want them to, because after I was hit I did what I was told, and then later I was hit again when I refused.

I don't know anyone who hits their kids now, don't know people whose parents hit them outside a little smack here and there. But beating your child into the ground? That's sickening. I called the cops on the bastard. Even a disciplinary attack that forces the kid into the ground and to scream so loud the whole damn neighborhood can hear is just unnecessary.

The house where this was from is full of drug dealers. They've even gotten more bold than they have in the past few years. Now there's at least 10 cars over there at a time and the place hasn't been stung just yet. It's disgusting. I sit on my porch and watch buyer after buyer after buyer go to the door, knock, slide some money beneath the door and then something slide back out. I've seen people without cars walk over with snacks already in hand before they buy their crap.

I'm tired of seeing lives ruined, I'm tired of fearing for my life and my mom doesn't care. She seems to think that to keep calling the cops will keep us safe. They've already yelled at her once to stop calling the cops, but she hasn't, neither have I. But at the border to mexico they can very easily find a way to get back at us. Somehow someway. But right now I think they're just building themselves up, and it's working. It needs to stop.

Make it stop.

Adressing a Social Problem

Carolyn Arita
Dr. Wei, Yong-Kang
English 1301
01 December, 2009
The Overall Problem of Homophobia
Homosexuality has been made taboo in the past few centuries. People have been ‘legally’ murdered in cold blood because of their sexual orientation, or suspected orientation as is sometimes the case. It was once common practice, these attacks, for many such actions to be against African-Americans. It was also the same for someone who was of different faith, or for someone who chose not to adhere to a society’s ways specifically. Now, today, murder is rampant, and what little acceptance there is of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, or Transgender(LGBT) community, it is met with spite and malice and hatred.

In the past ten years great strides have been made to urge acceptance of homosexuality. A few states have legalized gay marriage. President Barack Obama passed a bill condemning hate-crimes against LGBT people. However, despite these great strides towards true equality in America, many people have stood against these actions so vehemently they themselves have become the eye of scrutiny as well as heroes for their ventures. Such people are members of the Westboro Baptist Church led by Fred Phelps.

This church has been on the radar for many years now in reference to their any anti-gay, anti-American protests, holding such signs that say “God Hates Fags,” or “God Is Your Enemy.” They often use their own children as well, having them protest along side them despite the children really not understanding why they’re holding the signs other than the ‘fact’ that “God Hates Fag Enablers.” When you open their website you are shown their anti-semitic, anti-catholic, and anti-gay signs in a slideshow of pictures. Among these pictures is a paragraph meant to be an introduction to their website, as if to welcome you:

“Since 1955, Westboro Baptist Church (WBC) has taken forth the precious from the vile, and so is as the mouth of God (Jer. 15:19). In 1991, WBC took her ministry to the streets, conducting 41,226 over 34,000 peaceful demonstrations (to date) opposing the fag lifestyle of soul-damning, nation-destroying filth. In response, america bombed WBC; & burned WBC on 8-2-2008. God is america's enemy: 5,275 dead soldiers; $11 trillion+ in national debt. America crossed the line on June 26, 2003, when the Supreme Court (the conscience of the nation) ruled in Lawrence v. Texas that we must respect sodomy. WBC believes her gospel message to be this world's last hope.”
Even in schools homosexual children and teens are unprotected despite recently passed bills or already instated laws in that state regarding hate crimes against homosexuals. A recent example would be of a young man who was aware a group of teens planned to attack him and alerted several administrators and even his bus driver. No one helped him, or even batted an eye at his claims. He was attacked by the boys who used a metal pipe to beat him, but was saved from almost certain death by a neighbor who heard the commotion and came out wielding a shotgun. The attackers fled and the boy was taken to the hospital. He survived but is terrified and many parents feel betrayed by the school for allowing something like this to happen. A similar story takes place in Puerto Rico where, recently, an openly gay young man was found beheaded and partially burned. The police treated it as if the victim was not a victim at all, but rather because he was gay it was his own fault for getting killed. Human rights’ activists are appalled at how the case was being handled and many people in and outside of Puerto Rico are demanding an investigation of this man and to try the young mans murderer under the hate crime felony charges that should apply since President Obama passed the recent bill.
Education about homosexuals is almost non existent. Any reference to the LGBT community in history books is gone, which is a shame, because there are countless people in history who have made a difference in the world who were gay or lesbian. And if they didn’t make a world-wide difference, they still made an impact in American culture at the very least. Notable people are Divine, an American born actor who stared in almost all of openly gay director John Water’s films, most notably, in the film Hairspray. Another, possibly less remembered, but rather important person, is Oliver “Bill” Sipple. Sipple was former marine who saved President Gerald Ford from assassination in 1975. Bayard Rustin, organized of the civil rights march on Washington where Martin Luther King Jr. gave his “I Have A Dream” speech. These are only a few people in history who have made a difference, yet their sexual preference had nothing to do with what they accomplished in life.
In order to combat the rampant homophobia, children in middle school and high schools should be made aware that any stigma’s against homosexuality and homosexuals is not true. If you are molested by someone of the same sex that does not automatically make you gay; if you hear of a man who molested a young boy, that does not mean he is gay, and even if he was, there are also men who molest little girls, yet no one is crying out about how ‘evil’ heterosexuality is. AIDS is also not selective in its victims. Men and women, gay or straight, are able to contract the virus and die from it. Health classes should teach more about sex, even just a little more, to include homosexuality into the mix and assure students that just by being gay does not ensure you will contract AIDS, only reckless sex will ensure the contraction of any and every disease.
Parents should also be aware of what they do and say in front of their children. In a recent film titled “Prayers for Bobby” a mother comes to terms with why her son committed suicide and realizes that throughout his life and his coming out as homosexual she had made it increasingly hard on him because of her own homophobia and conservative ways. He relied on his mothers love and knew that without her acceptance he couldn’t really go on with all the doubts in his mind. She realized that all of her anti-gay speech drove him to kill himself. It is based on a true story and Bobby’s mother is still working in the LGBT community helping other families and teens who are struggling with acceptance of their sexuality and spreading awareness through special events.
The subject of the LGBT community in the media is strong. It is everywhere, it affects everyone because gay people are everywhere. They are in our schools as students and teachers. They are in our churches as members and as holy-men. They are in our court houses, our capitol buildings. Many people are hiding in the closet this very moment out of fear of the attacks they might receive. Many children and teens commit suicide every year because they are afraid of what their family might do or say to them. Because society in general, as a whole, has not fully accepted LGBT people into their midst even though they’ve been there since the dawn of time. Without these people we would be a very boring race of beings. A lot of our music, films, politics, religions would be boring and single-minded without some of these people who realized that thinking inside a box restricted a persons creativity and love. Without love this world is nothing, and love is the only thing LGBT people stand for, yet no one seems to understand what it entails and so continues the manipulation and defamation of human beings.













Work Cited



Andrew. "Same Sex Marriage In History: Same Sex Marriage". E-Not Alone. 11/21/09 .

"Pederasty". The Truth Tree. 11/21/09 .

Smith, Gwen. "Transgender Day of Remembrance". Transgender Day of Remembrance. 11/21/09 .

Fred, Phelps. "Westboro Baptist Church Home Page". Westboro Baptist Church. 11/21/09 .

Morrow, Chris. "The People God Hates". CNN iReport. 11/21/09 .